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    « Do not try this at home. Law of unintended consequences in force. | Main | The Mensa Invitational: New Definitions »
    Tuesday
    Jan112011

    Fox News Reports No Link Between Matches, Gasoline and Fire

    DateTuesday, January 11, 2011 at 19:08

    Beck Busts ‘Mainstream Media Myth’

    NEW YORK (The Borowitz Report) – The Fox News Channel today attempted to bust what it called a “mainstream media myth” by reporting that there was no link between matches, gasoline and fire.

    “Gasoline and matches don’t start fires,” said Fox host Glenn Beck.  “People start fires.”

    Mr. Beck went on to say that there was no link between “oxygen, hydrogen and water.”

    Elsewhere, Verizon trumpeted its new iPhone, announcing, “For the first time, consumers will have a choice of which wireless carrier drops their calls.”

    Get the Borowitz Report delivered to your inbox for free here.

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