maven&meddler

The mainstream media and blogosphere is once again all a-Twitter over details of the not-so-news of John Ensigns’ affair with staffer, Cynthia Hampton. The New York Times, late last week, ran an article detailing the possible ethics violations resulting from Ensign calling on backers to give the hapless husband, Doug Hampton, a nice parting gift of a plum job.

From The New York Times article:

“ On Oct. 1, it was reported that in early 2008 Mr. Ensign arranged for Mr. Hampton to join a political consulting firm and lined up several donors as his lobbying clients, according to interviews, e-mail messages and other records. Mr. Ensign and his staff then repeatedly intervened on the companies’ behalf with federal agencies in Washington, often after urging from Mr. Hampton.”

Whoops.

As the GOP steams in circles aboard the SS Minnow in search of any means to sink Obama, such untimely revelations and public musings can’t help their cause. The temptation to cast the entire Minnow crew here is almost more than I can stand. Default GOP party chieftain, Rush Limbaugh would be priceless as the ‘Skipper’.

But I digress.

As a woman, I can’t imagine being in Cynthia Hampton’s shoes. It just can’t have been that good. Really. Unless she somehow scored free designer shoes for life, she ended up looking quite the fool … if that’s possible considering the new found talent of her erstwhile boss/boyfriend and husband.

But, that said, I’ve lived long enough to know that we women can fall for great cologne, a sporting tan and a tight butt. Living on the high in Babylon by the Potomac probably makes resistance futile, especially when you may perceive yourself the object of a rising GOP star’s attention. I mean John was all varsity and so obviously destined for greater things ( 2012 perhaps? Gush!). And gee, he was so deeply religious…

Also from The New York Times article:

” Mr. Ensign is married and has three children. He and his wife, Darlene, were active for a time in Promise Keepers, a Christian evangelical ministry that promotes strong families and marriages.”

WTF was this Hampton woman thinking? Will Republicans ever understand irony?

This story has all the makings of a new Gilligans Island series, with the usual plot devices involving suspension of disbelief ( Cynthia Hampton as delightfully daffy “Lovey” Wentworth Howell?), slapstick schemes by a self-important goofball (Doug Hampton as Thurston Howell III) and our dear Senator as a more darkly tanned and cynical version of the ‘Professor’. There, I’ve done it. Eeew! A threesome, with the Professor doing Mrs. Howell.

Stay tuned, since this has a long, long story arc, and it won’t be pretty. Top Republicans, like Mitch McConnell, have spoken volumes with their reluctance to ‘comment’.

It’s over John. Turn out the lights and don’t let the door hit you in the ass.

Now, if we can turn to something that addresses more important issues of the day…